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Putting Your Controlling Ex Spouse in His or Her Place
- By Dani Taylor
- Published September 22nd, 2008
- Marriage
- Unrated
Dani Taylor
Dani Taylor is an active member of the Xstilla.com divorce support community. She is the editor for he article section and the author of many articles that help people find their way through complicated cases of divorce and child support issues.
View all articles by Dani Taylor
This article provides readers with tips on putting their ex spouses in his or her place. It includes advice like standing your ground, getting away from your ex spouse, and more. Read it if you want to take control of your personal life and feel free to choose what way to go and what to do to be happy.
When you have to deal with a controlling spouse, it’s difficult enough. Many people become so upset and stressed out from this that they seek a divorce. When you have to deal with your controlling ex spouse, things can become even worse. Divorce is supposed to free you from having to put up with this kind of thing but sometimes it doesn’t. This article discusses the problem of putting your controlling ex spouse in his or her place.
Stand Your Ground
Your ex spouse will continue to be controlling as long as he or she thinks they can get away with it. For this reason, it’s important that you don’t take it. Don’t allow them to tell you what to do, when to do it or how to do it. You are in control of yourself now and you are the only one who you should have to answer to. When you allow your ex spouse to control you, you only enable him or her to do it more. If they tell you to do something or not to do something, thank them for their advice and do as you
please.
Get Away from Your Ex Spouse
Although it’s not that easy to get away from your ex spouse if the two of you have children, you can limit the time you’re around each other as much as possible. When you drop the children off or pick them up, meet in a neutral location. Arrive on time and not early so you don’t have to be around your ex spouse for very long (this should also teach you some discipline). Also, if he or she calls – unless it’s directly related to the children or something else important, there’s no need to stay on the phone with them. Let them know that you’re busy and hang up. You are not obligated to be around him or her so don’t be. This will help stop them from being so controlling.
When All Else Fails…
If nothing else will work, you may need to seek help. You can get a restraining order by visiting your local criminal court clerk or police station. They will advise you on the best way to go about getting help. You may also want to consider therapy to deal with the remaining issues you may have from being in a controlling relationship. This will help you to move on with your life in a healthy, happy manner.
By following the tips and suggestions in this article, you can effectively deal with your controlling ex spouse. The divorce was difficult but now it’s time for you to be your own person. Good luck.
When you have to deal with a controlling spouse, it’s difficult enough. Many people become so upset and stressed out from this that they seek a divorce. When you have to deal with your controlling ex spouse, things can become even worse. Divorce is supposed to free you from having to put up with this kind of thing but sometimes it doesn’t. This article discusses the problem of putting your controlling ex spouse in his or her place.
Stand Your Ground
Your ex spouse will continue to be controlling as long as he or she thinks they can get away with it. For this reason, it’s important that you don’t take it. Don’t allow them to tell you what to do, when to do it or how to do it. You are in control of yourself now and you are the only one who you should have to answer to. When you allow your ex spouse to control you, you only enable him or her to do it more. If they tell you to do something or not to do something, thank them for their advice and do as you
Get Away from Your Ex Spouse
Although it’s not that easy to get away from your ex spouse if the two of you have children, you can limit the time you’re around each other as much as possible. When you drop the children off or pick them up, meet in a neutral location. Arrive on time and not early so you don’t have to be around your ex spouse for very long (this should also teach you some discipline). Also, if he or she calls – unless it’s directly related to the children or something else important, there’s no need to stay on the phone with them. Let them know that you’re busy and hang up. You are not obligated to be around him or her so don’t be. This will help stop them from being so controlling.
When All Else Fails…
If nothing else will work, you may need to seek help. You can get a restraining order by visiting your local criminal court clerk or police station. They will advise you on the best way to go about getting help. You may also want to consider therapy to deal with the remaining issues you may have from being in a controlling relationship. This will help you to move on with your life in a healthy, happy manner.
By following the tips and suggestions in this article, you can effectively deal with your controlling ex spouse. The divorce was difficult but now it’s time for you to be your own person. Good luck.